Exploring Adoption

Guest Column: Ethica: A Voice for Ethical Adoptions

By Linh Song, MSW
Executive Director of Ethica, Inc.

Ethica is an independent voice for ethical adoptions and we have mostly focused on assisting families in crisis; recovering from adoption fraud, immigration and delays from international policy changes, delivering humanitarian aid, and more. 

Our work reminds us that motherhood through adoption has its challenges and sometimes, heartbreak. Unfortunately, adoptions can be tainted by questionable practices and the victimization of vulnerable members of the adoption triad. When problems arise, families and their advocates approach Ethica for guidance and assistance. Their stories speak for themselves:

• An American mother calls, seeking help to recover her child, whose "adoption" she never consented to.
• An anthropologist calls seeking help for Vietnamese women who are searching for their children. They had been given as little as $31 USD as "poverty alleviation support" by Vietnamese officials who promised that their children will be returned to them in several years, and that until then the orphanage will provide for them. The children have been internationally adopted without their consent.
• A family is stranded in Guatemala, abandoned by their adoption agency in the midst of new policy changes that essentially close adoptions while the country centralizes its process.
• A young woman adopted from Eastern Europe, and then left in the U.S. foster care system, wonders if she is a citizen since she has no immigration paperwork and needs to apply for federal assistance.
• Adopted children in an African orphanage tell their prospective adoptive parents about being sexually abused. As a result they are denied food, and the orphanage threatens to stop their adoptions.
• An adoption agency uses a bait-and-switch tactic, offering children to prospective adoptive parents despite not having the appropriate paperwork or histories, then switching the "referral" in-country.
• A Christian missionary group questions if their donations are being used to care for orphans as the poor conditions persist.
• Families report giving "donations" of $5-7,000 to Vietnamese orphanage directors in order to complete their adoptions.  And yet two months ago, Ethica was asked to provide blankets and formula for babies dying from unusually cold weather in Vietnamese orphanages participating in international adoptions.

Ethica receives 50-80 inquiries a week from adoption triad members in crisis. Over the past 6 years, we have assisted over 8,000 children and families, often advocating for them with the U.S. Department of State, U.S. Citizenship and Immigration Services, and state attorney generals. Currently we are actively assisting over 200 children and families in the U.S., Guatemala, Vietnam, Liberia, Haiti, and Nepal.

In the United States, in addition to answering many questions and supporting individuals through difficult situations, we have conducted a review of state adoption laws. We have testified in person and in writing on adopted people's rights to their birth records. We have worked on cases involving the informed consent of first parents.

For more information about Ethica, visit www.ethicanet.org

*Note: Publication of this article does not indicate that I endorse this organization; I am merely providing information that may be of help to the wide range of people who visit the Exploring Adoption blog.

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How to Choose an Adoption Agency

I was the guest on Chicago's "This is the Day" show (WMBI) with Nancy Turner this morning. During the show, several listeners called in with questions about adoption. Due to time constraints, I didn't have a chance to address several of the questions as thoroughly as I would have liked. So I thought I'd tackle them here.

How do I find an ethical adoption agency/facilitator?

Last week, I met with a woman whose cousin recommended a particular Christian adoption agency that he had worked with. The woman began working with that agency, solely on her cousin's recommendation. Turns out that the agency was involved in unethical adoption practices, and had several lawsuits for wrongful adoption pending. After much heartache, a lawsuit, and severe financial loss, the couple switched agencies.

While we would hope that any adoption service provider would function ethically, the sad fact is that some of them--even a few so-called "Christian" agencies--do not.

When you hire an agency to help facilitate an adoption, you are putting the future of your family into the hands of strangers for months, perhaps years. It's imperative that you work with an agency with whom you feel completely comfortable and confident.

1. Find out how long the agency has been in business. Do they have a reliable track record?
2. Check with the Better Business Bureau and the Attorney General office in the state in which the agency is licensed (if the agency has branch offices in several states, check in both your state's branch as well as the corporate office's state). Does the agency have any complaints or lawsuits pending?
3. Ask the agency for references, with the assumption that they will refer you to happy clients. Contact those clients, and then ask the clients for the names of additional people they know who have worked with the agency. Call those people, as well.
4. Join an online discussion group for the type of adoption you plan to pursue (such as adopting from China, adopting from foster care, infant adoption). Ask other members of the group which agencies they do and don't recommend. You will get a cross section of responses, but those responses will help you to get a better feeling for how the agency functions and treats its clients.

What are the advantages and disadvantages of adopting through a state agency and a private agency?

If you hope to adopt a child from foster care, chances are, you can work with either a public agency in your state or a private agency. Many licensed private agencies contract with public agencies to place foster children.

While there are many wonderful social workers at public agencies, they are most often overworked and underpaid. They'll give you as much attention as they can, but you will likely not receive the same degree of private attention to your "case" as you would when working with a private agency.

In addition to placing children from foster care in adoptive families, many private agencies also have domestic infant programs and international programs; they offer a full range of services for adoptive parents.

Related Articles:

• Am I too old to adopt?
• Can I adopt if I'm on a limited income?
• Why is it so difficult for singles to adopt?
• When should I tell my child he/she was adopted?
• How to Avoid Unethical Adoption Agencies
• International Adoption: How to Choose a Reputable Agency
• How to Avoid Adoption Scams
• Tips for Avoiding Adoption Fraud

I go into greater detail on these and many other questions in my book: The Adoption Decision: 15 Things You Want to Know Before Adopting.

For more news and information about adoption, visit www.laurachristianson.com, and check out my Exploring Adoption bookstore.

Sign up for Adoption World, my free monthly eZine! Just send a blank email to adoptionworld@aweber.com

Adoption Fraud: Child Trafficking in Haiti, Guatemala

Two stories of adoption fraud in the news this week break my heart.

In Haiti, 47 children whose parents gave them away to traffickers in return for promises of financial assistance were freed from a rogue adoption center in Port-au-Prince. The children are between the ages of 2 and 7, were taken to Port-au-Prince (Haiti's capital) from  southwest Haiti between 6 months and 2 years ago. They are malnourished and some have skin diseases.

The International Organization for Migration (IOM) was alerted to the situation when the parents began complaining that they hadn't received their promised financial assistance. They children have been returned to their parents, with promises from the IOM that the organization will provide medical care and school fees.

A loophole in  Haiti's 1974 adoption laws allows these rogue agencies to traffick children, offering them to rich Haitians and foreigners in exchange for "processing fees" that often amount to $10,000.

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In Antigua, Guatemala, 46 children, ranging from newborns up to 3 years old, were discovered this week in an illegal foster home. None of the children had the proper adoption paperwork. The government has not yet decided where the children will be transferred.

Clarification to the above paragraph -- from additional reports since I posted this info:

Casa Quivira was raided by the Guatemalan police and PGN. Based on the story, it appears as though the situation was that the hogar itself did not have whatever licensing is required and that there was not proof that the cases had been presented/registered to the government.

There is nothing written in the story on this that would indicate the relinquishments were invalid or illegal.

Source: Guatemala Adoption Information and News

In Guatemala, child trafficking is often instigated by private lawyers who forge adoption papers or pay mothers to sell their children. Apparently, some lawyers charge adoptive parents up to $40,000.

According to a Reuters article, "The United States recently announced it would require two DNA tests on Guatemalan babies being adopted by Americans before issuing visas, in an effort to clean up the process."

Sources:

International Herald Tribune
Reuters

For more news and information about adoption, visit www.laurachristianson.com, and check out my Exploring Adoption bookstore.

 

Kenyan Pastor Arrested for Scamming Infertile Couples

I found an intriguing little article buried on page 19 of today's Seattle Times.

A pastor in Kenya was arrested for claiming to help infertile couples conceive "miracle babies."

Apparently, Pastor Gilbert Deya blessed infertile and post-menopausal women, praying that they would conceive "through the power of prayer and the Lord Jesus."

Nairobi police say Deya then sent the women to Kenya, supposedly to give birth.

In a not-so-coincidental coincidence, at the same time these prayed-for women were supposedly giving birth, newborn babies born to other parents were disappearing from the hospital. Some of these parents were told that their newborns had died when their babies disappeared from the hospital.

One "pregnant" woman whom Deya had prayed for described receiving injections for presumed labor pain, but was not conscious during childbirth.

Deya faces kidnapping charges and is suspected of international child trafficking.

Source: The Seattle Times, "Miracle" babies may have been kidnapped (Associated Press)

For more news and information about adoption, visit www.laurachristianson.com, and check out my Exploring Adoption bookstore.

The Sad, Sad World of Adoption Fraud

Lately I’ve received a couple of e-mails from people concerned about adoption fraud. Both of them asked me to alert my readers to common scams in the adoption world.  Here’s a summary of their stories:

The ‘heartfelt plea’ scam
Story #1 comes from a 28-year-old single mother of one who has completed her adoption home study. She has unsuccessfully been attempting to adopt independently for some time. She has also gone through social services, but has discovered that the social workers prefer older, married, wealthier parents.

Lately she has been inundated with e-mails from “Africa,” from so-called parents claiming they want to place their child with her but need money for a ticket to the U.S.

The ‘re-routed adoption fee’ scam
Story #2 comes from a woman and her husband who accepted a referral of 2-month-old twin girls from a third-world country a year ago. Upon receiving the referral, the parents-to-be traveled to the country and spent five days with them in a hotel getting to know them.

Two months later, they received notice that one of their babies was quite sick and in the hospital. The mom-to-be caught the first flight to that country the same day and was en route when she learned that their daughter had died in the hospital. The mom visited the hospital and noted that since she had met her daughter two months earlier, the baby had been severely neglected.

Four months later, their adoption coordinator informed the couple that the organization’s policy was not to refund their money for the baby who died, but to give them a new referral instead. Later they were told that all their adoption fees had gone to care for their dying daughter. However, the orphanage director in the country informed them that their adoption fees were being used to build a new orphanage, rather than to care for the children.

Reflections
Both these stories are heartbreaking. Unfortunately, they are fairly typical examples of scams perpetrated on would-be adoptive parents. I’m grateful that the parents in both instances are aware that they’re easy targets for con artists and are treading very carefully through the adoption process. Being alert to the possibility of adoption scams is the first step in combating them.

Advice
If you receive polite e-mails from a “mother in father” in Nigeria or Congo or some other African country begging you to adopt their child, delete them. I, too, receive these e-mails on a weekly basis and know that many of my fellow adoption bloggers do, as well. They’re scams. Period. IGNORE THEM. If you plan to adopt, do so through legal channels, by using the services of a respected and highly-recommended licensed adoption agency, facilitator, social worker or adoption attorney.

In the same vein, demand to receive an accounting for all adoption fees you pay up front, before you complete your home study (Note: you can’t always do this with domestic adoption, but you usually can with international adoption).

Organizations that handle intercountry adoptions almost always have their complete fee schedule available to prospective parents. If you’re concerned about contingencies in case of your child’s death (before you bring him or her home), get it in writing, on a contract.

Readers, please chime in here and help others learn from you:

• What experiences have you had with adoption fraud?
• How did you get sucked into a scam situation?
• How did you get out of it?
• What advice do you have for prospective parents who want to avoid getting scammed?

Related posts:

Online Baby Scams on the Rise

How to Avoid Unethical Adoption Agencies

Avoiding Adoption Fraud

How to Avoid Adoption Scams

A New Twist on Adoption Fraud

Yet Another Adoption Fraud!

The Pros and Cons of Independent Adoption

Book Review: The Cruelest Con: The Guide for a S.a.F.E. Adoption Journey

For more news and information about adoption, visit www.laurachristianson.com, and check out my Exploring Adoption bookstore.

Yet Another Adoption Fraud!

It seems as if scam artists intent on committing adoption fraud are everywhere this month. An Austin, Texas woman was just arrested for convincing a business partner to write $10,000 in checks to secure the adoption of a baby in China.  The baby didn't exist.

The woman already faces two counts of fraud and one count of tampering with a government document for stealing more than $100,000 from other business partners.

A word to the wise: If someone you know asks you for money to help them adopt a child, do your homework before contributing! For information on how to prevent adoption fraud, see tips in my entries from June 6 and 8 and March 2 and 3.

Link: News 8 Austin | 24 Hour Local News | LOCAL NEWS | Arrest over fradulent adoption deal.

Related Articles:

• How to Avoid Unethical Adoption Agencies
• How to Choose an Adoption Agency
• International Adoption: How to Choose a Reputable Agency
• How to Avoid Adoption Scams
• Adoption Fraud: Child Trafficking in Haiti, Guatemala
• The Sad, Sad World of Adoption Fraud

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A New Twist on Adoption Fraud

Here's an unusual story about adoption fraud in reverse. A Florida woman was arrested this week for telling people she has cancer and has 6 months to live. She asked for people to adopt her 11-year-old daughter.  One man gave her nearly $5,000 (not for the daughter, but for groceries, etc.). Authorities believe that the woman has victimized six others. Her daughter is now in foster care.

Link: Bradenton woman charged in cancer, adoption fraud case.

Online Baby Scams on the Rise

Adoption.com is my favorite online “one stop adoption shop.” The site has everything, from informative articles for adoptive families, birth families, foster families and adoption professionals to photolistings of waiting children a link where prospective parents can post their profiles in hopes of getting matched with a birth mother.

I was dismayed to learn that an unethical woman – ok, let’s just call her a criminal – has been preying on would-be parents. Apparently, a women who went by the screenname noahsmom127, claimed to have access to birth mothers who wanted to place their babies for adoption. The woman promised to get couples in touch with the birth moms if they sent $200.

Hundreds of couples, from states such as California, New York, Utah, Texas, and Florida, sent $200 and never heard from the woman again. Although investigators know the identity of the woman, no arrests have been made and no charges have been filed yet. The woman has been scamming couples for over two years.

I’ve mentioned this in previous blogs, but it bears repeating: whenever potential adoptive parents and birth parents hook up, they should hire an adoption attorney and/or an adoption social worker in the birth mother’s hometown to assess the situation. Legitimate adoption professionals are usually aware of the current adoption scams and will alert you to red flags, such as birth parents who demand monetary support, who refuse medical care, who are transient or living in motels.

Think with your head, not your heart
People who want to adopt often think with their hearts instead of their heads. They yearn so badly for a child that they tend to overlook the warning signs of a possible scam. Although adoption is a transaction of the heart, it is also very much a transaction of the pocketbook, and people need to use wise business sense when investigating adoption, just as they would in any situation where they’re spending thousands of dollars.

On the whole, people who respond to the family profiles posted on websites are decent, honest people. But unfortunately, there are those who willingly prey on the emotions of desperate couples in exchange for a quick buck (or a quick couple hundred bucks).

I can’t stress enough the importance of asking resource people for references. Join adoption discussion groups (both online and in person) and pepper the participants with questions. When you’ve narrowed your choice of adoption professionals down to your top three, ask the agency or facilitator to send references from people who have recently adopted. Then contact those people and ask hard questions.

Keep in mind that one person may have a horrible experience with an adoption professional while another may have a perfectly delightful one. That’s because adoption professionals are so relational-based. Keep asking questions of clients and former clients until you are ready to choose a professional who you feel confident of and comfortable working with. After all, the future of your family rests in these people’s hands!

For more on adoption scams, see my entries for June 6, March 2 and 3.

How to Avoid Unethical Adoption Agencies

International adoptions are on the rise (there were nearly 23,000 of them last year in the United States), while domestic adoptions are becoming increasingly rare. Unfortunately, adoption scams are becoming more prevalent, particularly among adoption service providers specializing in international/intercountry adoption. A few examples:

• Parents pay thousands of dollars in fees and are promised a child, then don’t receive that child. They learn that several groups of parents were lined up to adopt the same child.
• Parents are “matched” with a particular child and arrive in the country, only to discover that their child has died or has already been adopted by a different family.
• Parents intend to adopt an orphan, but learn that the child they hope to adopt was sold to an adoption facilitator and brought to the United States with fraudulent identification documents.
• Parents are required to “donate” thousands of dollars towards an orphanage relief fund. They assume that the money is being used to improve living conditions in their child’s orphanage or to purchase supplies, clothing and medicine for the children. They learn that the funds have been diverted to an unscrupulous adoption worker’s personal account or were never used for their intended purpose.
• Parents are assigned travel dates to bring their child home, and those dates change, again…and again…and again.

Some of the confusion, particularly with travel dates, can be attributed to the ever-changing adoption procedures instituted in many countries. However, if you suspect a hint of wrongdoing on the part of your adoption service provider, start asking questions.

Compare notes with others who have adopted recently through your agency or who are waiting to adopt. Ask whether they are experiencing similar issues and document, in writing, their concerns. Your agency should be happy to provide you with referrals; you can also gather information from members of local adoptive parent groups.

Ask about the type of screening and training that your agency requires of its staff. Do employees have to pass background checks and meet minimum educational and experience requirements? Do those requirements pertain to all staff, both full-time and part-time?

Check the average waiting periods and other restrictions for adopting children from specific countries (Country-specific information is available at The U.S. Department of State, Bureau of Consular Affairs) Contact several agencies to determine whether their restrictions are similar (they should be fairly consistent among agencies). If your agency appears far out of the ordinary, you’ll need to do further investigation.

Check with the licensing department of the state where the agency operates to determine whether the agency is licensed, how long they’ve been licensed and whether their license is valid. Because the U.S. government  has very few adoption regulations, many unlicensed facilitators work without oversight.

If possible, check with adoption authorities in the country from which you plan to adopt, to determine whether your agency is accredited (and on good terms) with their government.

Contact the Better Business Bureau in the state in which your agency is licensed to determine whether any complaints have been filed (a complaint doesn’t necessarily indicate that your agency is a “bad guy,” it merely alerts you that someone has registered a concern).

Keep a journal of your thoughts, emotions, and expectations, recommends the staff at Ethica, a non-profit group that advocates for better adoption regulations. Because there are so few legal protections for people involved in adoption, it’s critical for you to keep detailed records, just in case you have a misunderstanding or something goes wrong. They recommend keeping copies of documents and contracts, receipts, e-mails, and faxes. “Write down the dates and times of phone calls, whom you spoke with, and what was discussed. Make notes of inconsistencies, questions raised, or comments that your adoption service provider makes that strike you as odd or unusual.”

Related Articles:

• How to Choose an Adoption Agency
• International Adoption: How to Choose a Reputable Agency
• How to Avoid Adoption Scams
• Tips for Avoiding Adoption Fraud

Sign up for Adoption World, my free monthly eZine! Just send a blank email to adoptionworld@aweber.com

 For more news and information about adoption, visit www.laurachristianson.com, and check out my Amazon Exploring Adoption bookstore.

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http://www.aweber.com/?295076

Avoiding Adoption Fraud

Parents wanting to adopt independently have traditionally advertised in the local newspaper’s classifieds. “Fun-loving, financially secure, happily married couple in our early 30s, eager to adopt a baby.”

Similar “ads” are now popping up all over cyberspace. Registry services at websites such as Adoption.com post photos and detailed profiles of prospective adoptive families (Adoption.com lists 243 parent profiles). ChristianAdoption.com, another registry service, posts a state-by-state listing of parent profiles. Potential birth parents who plan to place their child for adoption can view profiles at those registries and contact the families.

That’s just what happened to Deana and Rick Watson, who posted their profile on ChristianAdoption.com for two months. Suddenly, three prospective birth mothers contacted them in one day. Before talking to them on the phone or meeting in person, the Watsons communicated with them via e-mail. 

“Once you speak with a birth parent on the phone, things become real, says Deana. “E-mail allows both parties to keep some distance.” It gives biological parents the chance to become acquainted with several couples before they choose a family to adopt their child. Should the birth parents choose another couple, the break is less painful – for everyone involved.

Common Sense In Matters of the Heart

Although the vast majority of adoptions progress smoothly, wise parents should use caution throughout the process – especially in cyberspace, where anonymity my encourage adoption fraud. Women, hungry for money or attention, pose as birth mothers and promise their phantom baby to multiple families.

Becca and Rick Blank thought they were “matched” with a birth mom, “until she laid huge guilt trips on us, trying to get money from us.”

Another woman asked at least two families if she could live with them during the last months of her pregnancy. Yet another claimed to be pregnant but was unwilling to release medical information or her attorney’s name.

One would-be adoptive mom realized she was being conned when she discussed her situation with an online friend and discovered they were both conversing with the identical birth mother.

She recommends, “Be cautious. Make sure it’s real. There will be signs if it’s not. Take your time and get to know each other by having an e-mail relationship. Plan to meet in person after several months. By then she will be showing and you will know that she is really pregnant.”

Red Flags That Could Indicate Adoption Fraud

According to Joan Ward, a Seattle-based adoption social worker, red flags indicating possible adoption fraud include the following:

• Birth parents who ask about money
• Birth parents who are transient or living in motels
• Birth parents who refuse medical care
• Birth parents who won’t provide a return phone number or address
• Birth parents who refuse to allow the adoptive parent at least limited access to her medical information (as it pertains to the pregnancy). This may indicate she's taking drugs and is afraid of submitting to urinanalysis tests.

"It is so important for adoptive parents to work with top-notch and highly experienced social workers and adoption attorneys," says Joan. When she becomes aware of a scam, Joan usually contacts the major adoption attorneys in Seattle, alerting them to the situation. "I always ask my clients to call me when they've had contact with a potential birth mother," she says.

If the birth parent lives out of state, Joan recommends hiring an adoption attorney or social worker in the birth mother’s hometown to assess the situation. "I am often hired by out-of-state adoptive parents to evaluate potential birth parent situations in Seattle," she says. "It's sad to say but I have found potential birth mothers who aren't pregnant or birth mothers who are promising their baby to several adoptive families.

Joan also cautions people to be aware of mentally ill birth mothers, including those with personality disorders. "Birth mothers with psychological disorders are not at all uncommon, and their disorder may not be immediately apparent to the untrained eye, or to the prospective adoptive parent desperate to have a child," says Joan.

Proceed With Caution – Especially When Using the Internet to Research Adoption

 

 

Caution is a must for people who plan to adopt, whether they adopt independently or use the services of an agency or facilitator.

One family got burned by an agency they located on the Internet. The agency, which touts that they place over 200 infants per year, collected payments from the couple, who languished for two years on the waiting list. When the couple complained about the lack of action, the agency bowed out of working with them, but refused to return their money.

Would-be parents must check references – and not just the references an agency supplies. Bulletin boards, e-mail lists and chat rooms are great places to gather firsthand information from people who have worked with particular agencies.

Prospective parents should become versed in the adoption laws of their own state, as well as the state or country from which they plan to adopt. If they suspect fraud or unethical practices by an agency or facilitator, they should contact their state licensing specialist.

The state’s Better Business Bureau (www.bbb.org/), the Attorney General, or the Social Services headquarters have information about complaints, investigation or litigation against agencies.

Adapted from “Adopting? Click Here,” by Laura Christianson. Originally published in Christianity Online magazine, Spring 2000.

Related Articles:

• How to Avoid Unethical Adoption Agencies
• How to Choose an Adoption Agency
• International Adoption: How to Choose a Reputable Agency
• How to Avoid Adoption Scams
• Adoption Fraud: Child Trafficking in Haiti, Guatemala
• The Sad, Sad World of Adoption Fraud
• Yet Another Adoption Fraud!

Sign up for Adoption World, my free monthly eZine! Just send a blank email to adoptionworld@aweber.com

For more news and information about adoption, visit www.laurachristianson.com, and check out my Amazon Exploring Adoption bookstore.

Create your own E-newsletters and e-mail templates:
http://www.aweber.com/?295076