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Parisian Halts Sale of Dolls to 'Adopt'

In October, I wrote about a toy-marketing campaign that urged girls to "adopt" lifelike baby dolls. The gist of the marketing was that children (and their parents) would browse through "Newborn Nursery Adoption Centers" to choose one of 22 models of dolls to "adopt."

I learned today that the Parisian Division of Saks Incorporated halted the sale of the dolls.

Late last year, the Evan B. Donaldson Adoption institute spearheaded an effort to end the doll "adoption" campaign by the manufacturer and the retailers who participated in it, saying that the campaign was "based on antiquated, discredited perceptions of adoption."

Pertman argued that the campaign:

  • Implicitly eliminates key participants in the adoption process -- i.e., the women and men who give life to the babies, and who in infant adoption today typicaly choose the new parents for their children.
  • Suggests adoptive parents shop for babies as they do for products and perpetuates damaging myths about how adoption works, including a notion that adopted children are commodities.
  • Futhers an inaccurate portrayal of adoption, which risks formenting another generation of negative, uninformed attitudestoward adopted people, their parents by birth and adoption, and adoption per se.

Parisian is the only company to date to respond to the Institute's initiative.

A letter from Parisian to Executive Director Adam Pertman said, "We have decided to remove references to adoption from our process...we never intended to offend or demean the seriousness of adoption."

Pertman said he was heartened by and grateful for Parisian's action. "It shows two things: that people in business aren't always concerned with only the bottom line, but can also show their regard for deeply important issues; and that advocates for families and children can have a real, on-the-ground impact."

For more articles about adoption, please visit my Web site, www.laurachristianson.com and my Christian Adoption blog at adoption.com.

Moving Through Adoption Loss

We've just returned from a weeklong vacation to Disney World and today, February 27, 2006, we celebrate our youngest son's 10th birthday.  In honor of his birth and entrance into our family, it seems only fitting that I continue the series I began last week at my adoption.com blog, in which I share with you the details of our adoption story.

This week's series was difficult for me to write, because I emotionally revisited the grief that we experienced during our year of adoption losses. But stick with me throughout the week, folks -- the story does have a happy ending!

Coming this week at the Christian Adoption Blog (I'll hyperlink to each post as it goes live):

For more articles about adoption, please visit my Web site, www.laurachristianson.com.

The Adoption Process

Today I start a new series called "Getting Started With Adoption" at my adoption.com blog.

As I walk you through my personal adoption story, I'll point out many important things you need to consider as you go through the adoption process.

Here's an outline of the series:

This series will be continued next week.

For more articles about adoption, visit my Web site, www.laurachristianson.com.

Talking About Adoption at School

I'm starting a week-long series today at my Christian Adoption Blog called "Tales from the Schoolyard."

Today's posts focus on elementary school. I'll discuss alternatives to the "family tree" assignment and share some of my children's adoption-related experiences.

Wednesday, Feb. 15 we'll discuss when to tell your child's teacher about your child's adoption and I'll share some of my middle schooler's experiences.

Thursday, Feb. 16 we'll look at 10 tips for helping your children field questions about adoption.

Friday, Feb. 17 we'll examine ways to help your child's teacher understand adoption.

For more articles about adoption, visit my Web site, www.laurachristianson.com.

Crayola Makes Multicultural Markers, Pencils and Crayons

Crayola_markers Here's a cool idea from Crayola:  multicultural washable markers, pencils and crayons.

A friend who adopted her daughter from India purchased these because the typical black, brown and white colors don't do justice to the many shades that children come in. Crayola calls the colors "ethnic-sensitive."

For more articles about adoption, visit my Web site, www.laurachristianson.com.

Ohio Adoption Doctor to Blog About International Adoption

Dr. Ellen Kempf, director of the Oak Adoptive Health Center at Akron Children's Hospital, will blog about international adoption during her 9-day trip to China. Dr. Kempf is accompanying a group of families adopting children. She'll spend today, Sunday and Monday in Beijing and then will travel to Nanning (Guagxi province) to spend time in an orphanage. She'll return home February 18.

Although her blog isn't up and running as of the time I write this post, you'll be able to read it at https://www.akronchildrens.org/cms/subsite/b0c78ff0c81191e3/

Dr. Kempf, an adoptive mom, called the trip "the ultimate continuing medical education." The Oak Adoptive Health Center assists families going through the adoption process by offering pre-adoption consultation, post adoption health exams, developmental assessments and consultation regarding attachment and other psychological aspects of adoption.

Sources:
The Beacon Journal, "Doctor to share lessons on adoption in a blog," by Cheryl Powell
Akron Children's Hospital news release

For more articles about adoption, visit my Web site, www.laurachristianson.com.

Sharon Stone Discusses Adoption

A ContactMusic.com article about Sharon Stone adopting her two children brought up all sorts of adoption-related issues for me.

The article first tells us that Stone "refuses to hide her two children's adoption from them."

Refuses. Interesting choice of words. Why would she want to hide the fact that she adopted them? Does the reporter believe that adoption -- in and of itself -- is so shameful that Stone should consider hiding from her children the details of how they joined her family?

(An aside on shameful -- Stone's fame is in large part based on her role in the movie "Basic Instinct." Maybe Stone should consider hiding that from her kiddos!)

Stone says that she has already told her son Roan that he was adopted, and she plans to tell son Laird as soon as he's old enough to understand. Good for you, Sharon. Adopted kids and birth parents have suffered too long from the stigma that adoption must be kept secret at all costs.

Next, Stone says she thinks adoptive parents have a deeper connection with their children than biological parents. Well, that's a new one! Adoptive families are constantly stereotyped as families who can't possibly love each other as much as biological families because they're missing the mysterious, all-important "genetic connection." Stone flips this stereotype on its head, jokingly referring to "all the poor mothers who just have birth children -- they don't know what it really means to have a child pick you and you pick them." 

Groan. Why do we obsess with comparing who loves whom more? Can't we be content with knowing that biological parents love their kids (most of the time), birth parents love the children they placed for adoption (usually from afar), and adoptive parents love their kids (most of the time).

Then there's this choosing business. Well, yeah, Stone and her kids might have picked each other out at an orphanage, but the reality of adoption is that, while adoptive parents  purposefully choose to add a child to their family, that child is often chosen for them by a social worker, attorney or government worker. And in private domestic adoptions, it's usually the birth parent(s) who choose an adoptive family for their child. Let's not let choosing one's child become a measuring stick of our love for them. Let's just love 'em. Period.

Stone's final comment is that "our kids look so much more like us than birth children look like their parents."

Double groan. This statement makes me wonder why Stone's trying so hard to validate her adoptive parenthood. Why should it matter who the kids look like? Does looking like one's parents somehow validate a child's place within his or her family? Let's allow our children -- adopted or not -- to just look like themselves.

Related Posts About Sharon Stone:

Actress Sharon Stone Adopts Grandparents

Celebrities Adopting

Sharon Stone Adopts Third Child

For more articles about adoption, visit my Web site, www.laurachristianson.com.

Interest in Adopting Children with Down Syndrome Increases

An informative feature in the Belleville News Democrat discusses the increasing popularity of adopting children with Down syndrome. Here's a summary of the article's key points:

Why is interest in adopting children with Down syndrome increasing?

  • Children with Down syndrome are not usually institutionalized, as they were in the past.
  • Society's attitudes toward people with disabilities is becoming more accepting. Today, you're likely to see people with disabilities in the media, places of worship and in schools.
  • Medical treatments have improved. That and earlier intervention have increased the life expectancy of people with Down syndrome to the 50s and 60s.

Who adopts children with Down syndrome?
Most people who seek to adopt Down Syndrome children have had a family member, friend or acquaintance with the disorder, or work with them in medical or school professions.

What are the risks of adopting a child with Down syndrome?

Health issues.

  • Nearly half of those with Down syndrome will have some heart defect
  • About one-third will develop thyroid problems
  • About 1 percent develop leukemia
  • Nearly all will have some delay in motor and speech development
  • Most men with Down syndrome are infertile
  • Other potential problems include intestinal or spine malformations and hearing difficulties

What programs will assist me with adopting a child with Down syndrome?
The Down Syndrome Association of Cincinnati has an Adoption Awareness Program. Through the program, people who want a child with Down syndrome are connected with birth mothers or adoption agencies. The program staff does not handle any of the legal paperwork required for adoption.

During the first year of the program (23 years ago), homes were found for three children with Down syndrome. Now, the staff works with three-to-five situations a week and the program has a waiting list of 150. Adoptive parents wait for a child between six months to a year, on average. Prospective parents include single people, couples who already have a child with Down syndrome and those who are childless.

For more information about Down syndrome:

Source: Belleville News Democrat, "Children with Down syndrome increasingly sought for adoption," by Margaret Stafford

For more articles about adoption, visit my Web site, www.laurachristianson.com.

New Blogs Launched at Adoption.com

Feels like forever since I've posted...I'm recovering from a horrible bout with the flu that is rampaging through my family. I hope to be back up to speed soon.

I'm pleased to announce the latest news in the adoption community: the launch of 26 brand new adoption blogs at adoption.com. The bloggers got the go-ahead on Monday to start blogging, so most of the blogs have only one or two posts, but what I've seen so far looks promising. These new blogs will provide a wealth of information and reflections on adoption-related topics.

If you subscribe to adoptionweek e-zine, the official announcement about the blog launch will appear in next week's issue.

I'll be writing the Christian Adoption blog for adoption.com. I plan to offer different content here at "Exploring Adoption" than I do at adoption.com, so I'll regularly refer you to posts at my Christian Adoption blog.

Here are links to the new blogs at adoptionblogs.com:

For more articles about adoption, visit my Web site, www.laurachristianson.com.

20 Most Popular Articles on 'Exploring Adoption' Blog

  1. Avoiding Adoption Fraud
  2. The Adoption Home Study: What to Expect During the Home Visit
  3. What Happens When Birth Parents Want Their Child Back?
  4. Free Adoption Search Registries
  5. Four Strategies Single Adoptive Parents Can Use to Cope with Stress
  6. International Adoption: How to Choose a Reputable Agency
  7. When Should You Tell Your Child He Was Adopted?
  8. Pros and Cons of Adoption
  9. Pros and Cons of Open Adoption
  10. Adopting a Child with Down Syndrome
  11. Cultural Programs for Adopting Russian Orphans
  12. How Much Does It Cost to Adopt?
  13. The Federal Adoption Tax Credit Explained
  14. How to Start and Adoption and/or Infertility Ministry: Planning an Adoption Workshop
  15. Actress Sharon Stone Adopts Grandparents
  16. Myths About Bonding
  17. Questions to Ask An Adoption Professional
  18. How to Avoid Unethical Adoption Agencies
  19. Adoption Statistics: 2005 Year in Review
  20. Heritage Tours for Adopted Children

For more articles about adoption, visit my Web site, www.laurachristianson.com.

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    Adoption Blogs

    • A Little Pregnant
      You want blogs? Julie's got blogs for you. Check out her "somewhat haphazard collection of links" to blogs pertaining to infertility, adoption, pregnancy after infertility or loss, and being a parent. You won't be disappointed.
    • About Adoption/Foster Care
      Written by Carrie Craft, this informative blog at about.com offers a variety of interesting tidbits about adoption and foster care.
    • Adopt Taiwan
      By Cindy, a Christian mom-to-be who is waiting to adopt from Taiwan.
    • Adoption Adventure
      Lena Wright, a certified professional coach and Christian counselor, is adopting two brothers from Haiti.
    • Adoption Family
      Hot links to hundreds of adoption websites, organized by topic.
    • Adoption Options Web Directory & Resources
      Free adoption articles to acquaint people with their options, as well as links to other quality adoption sites.
    • Adoption Share
      An online community where you can share experiences, find answers and purchase resources related to adoption.
    • Adoption.org Blogs
      The comprehensive adoption web site, adoption.org, recommends a few adoption blogs and has a discussion board.
    • AdoptLove
      A couple's journey to adopt a child from Ukraine.
    • Adventures in Daily Living
      Jamie and Suzanne's adventures with their adopted children from Russia.
    • And Chloe Makes 6
      By Becky, mother of four, and waiting for #5 to come home from China.
    • Anonymous Daughter
      By an adult adopted person whose biological father contacted her.
    • Big Momma Hollers
      By Cindy Bodie, a 51-year-old happily single mother of 39 kids ages 3-32.
    • Blogging Baby
      A blog about pregnancy, baby care and parenting. Some adoption issues covered. Entertaining and informative -- one of my faves.
    • Chronicles of Mommyhood
      Written by an African American mom from Pennsylvania who loves to share stories and resources with other African American families who are seeking to adopt. You can read about their adoption adventure in their first blog: http://cleandsylsjourney.blogspot.com/.
    • Crowned with Laurel
      By Esther, who has experienced two failed adoptions from Russia and is now embarking on adopting from a different country.
    • Do They Have Salsa in China?
      Gotta love the title of this blog! You can probably figure out what it's about.
    • Embracing the Journey to my Daughter and Beyond
      By Billie, who's recording her feelings about adopting her daughter from Taiwan as a gift to her daughter.
    • Families.com Adoption Blog
      A group blog written by an adult adopted person and several adoptive parents.
    • Family Building: From Where I Sit
      Cynthia Peck writes this informative blog, which covers many aspects of family building, from assisted reproductive technology to adoption to long-term foster care.
    • Fat Girl's Guide to Triathalons
      Candid comments about the home study process from a mom who's waiting to adopt.
    • Finding Sweetness
      By Kristin, who's waiting to adopt a baby from Vietnam.
    • Foster Care & Adoption Author's Site
      Okay, it's not a blog; it's Jayne Schooler's author website. Jayne is well-known for supporting, educating and encouraging families formed by birth, adoption or foster care.
    • From Hope to Reality
      The blog of Carolina Hope Christian Adoption Agency. Lots of in depth discussions and interviews about adoption issues.
    • Hand Picked
      Written by a couple who is waiting to adopt a son from Korea.
    • Heartprints
      Sharon Brani, an adoption coach and counselor, offers encouragement and inspiration for adoptive parents.
    • Heidi's Hotline
      Reflections about adoption and about writing from Heidi Saxton, an adoptive mom of two former foster children and editor of a magazine for Catholic "Women of Grace," www.womenofgrace.com.
    • His Heart
      By Erin, a Christian woman who has experienced infertility for 9 of her 11 years of marriage, and is moving towards adoption.
    • His Heart for Orphans
      This ministry of Healing Place Church in Baton Rouge, LA, supports families during their pre-adoption journey.
    • Hydrangeas are pretty
      Pre-adoptive mom Shelli writes this blog about waiting to adopt domestically.
    • International Adoption Stories
      An adoption directory featuring international adoption information and agency advice from Russia, Kazakhstan, Ukraine, Guatemala, China, Hong Kong, Taiwan, Vietnam, Haiti, Mexico, Ethiopia and other counties. In addition to stories, the site includes information on adoption costs and financing, medical and health advice, parenting tips and news.
    • It's A Girl!
      The Seyler family writes about raising their special needs daughter adopted from Ukraine.
    • Jochebed's Hope
      A non-profit ministry aimed at promoting the Biblical foundation for adoption.
    • Just Enjoy Him: Ramblings of a Mid-Life Mom
      By Judy, a 45-year-old mom of a 5-year-old son born in Vietnam.
    • Lifemothers.com
      Although it's not a blog, this Web site for birth mothers is excellent. With the belief that a birthmother's role does not end at 'birth,' but continues for life, Lifemothers strives to be a safe haven for all Lifemoms, regardless of age or contact with child.
    • Links to Adoption Sites
      Links to adoption agencies, books, blogs, and personal sites.
    • Martha's Voice on Adoption
      Adoption info and commentary from Martha Osborne, editor of RainbowKids.com International Adoption E-Zine.
    • Mommy Monsters
      Heidi Saxton, columnist for CatholicMom.com, writes smart, refreshing posts about adoptive parenthood (among other things).
    • My Adoption Links
      A self-described "obsessive person collecting adoption links." Organized alphabetically.
    • Neither Here Nor There
      Written by The Passionate Peach, a 30-something reluctant adoptee who has been reunited with her birth family for over two decades.
    • Our Adoption Journey
      By Todd and Kimberly Phillips, who are waiting to adopt a special needs child from China.
    • Our Adoption Journey
      By a couple who is adopting from foster care.
    • Pamela Kruger
      A blog about motherhood, marriage, work, and life in suburbia by a mom who adopted from Kazakhstan.
    • Paradise Preoccupied
      Written by adoption advocate Sandra Hanks Benoiton, this blog is a cool combo of news tidbits and edgy commentary.
    • RainbowKids Blog Community
      Blogs from families who have adopted or are adopting internationally.
    • Red Lights
      Written by Monica, a single mom from Alberta, Canada who adopted a son with Down syndrome. Gorgeous design; interesting read -- don't miss this blog!
    • Red Thread Dads
      Jack Bailey, a dad-to-be who created his blog for to-be-dads, dads who have already adopted, and even those who are contemplating the idea of Chinese adoption. Not updated often, but then, he's probably busy getting ready to bring his daughter home.
    • Research-China.Org
      To educate adoptive parents about Chinese culture, China adoptions and aspects of a child's early life in China.
    • Ryan J Hale
      Ryan is a foster dad who reflects on his upcoming adoption from China. His entries are from a Christian worldview.
    • Stuart & Liz's Adoption Blog
      The highs and lows of one couple's journey through the UK adoption process.
    • The Adoption Choice
      A forum to help pregnant women and teens considering adoption.
    • The Chambers' Adoption Process
      By Brit and Heath, who are waiting to adopt domestically (U.S.)
    • The Life of a Texas Mom
      Gwen is a Christian adoptive mom of three who regularly shares bits of her adoption story.
    • The Seventh Diamond
      Kimberley Girvin and her husband prepare for the arrival of their family's seventh member, a daughter from China.
    • Third Mom
      A thoughtful, well-written blog by Margie Perscheid, mom of two Korean teens, wife of 30+ years, and Korean adoption activist.
    • This Woman's Work
      Dawn Friedman, an associate editor at epregnancy magazine, writes this blog about writing, mothering, and writing about mothering. Includes reflections on adoption.
    • Ukraine Adoption Journal
      Steven Harper Pizik chronicles his family's journal to adopt two boys from Ukraine.
    • Waiting for Mercy
      By Michelle, a mom of four boys who is waiting to adopt a little girl from Guatemala.
    • Writer's Wanderings
      Freelance writer, Karen Robbins, is also an adoptive mom. Her blog contains "musings along life's journey."